Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

At the beginning of 2020 I chose the word explode for my year. When I selected that word I thought it would be my business that would explode. Little did I know God had bigger plans than that. Every single area of my life ended up changing - mentally, physically, emotionally, my home, my work, my parenting. All the energy from the past few years I put forth came together to form this new life I have now. I am obsessively grateful for where I am today, but I’ll never forget where I came from. I believe that are moments of struggle are tests of faith. As we move through those dark valleys with faith and hope we are able to make it to the other side where the blessing lie. My life is a living testimony of that. It didn’t explode until I pushed through the pain. It didn’t reap the blessings without the sacrifice.

You see God has work for us to do internally. Now as I look back upon earlier parts of my life I put my faith in the wrong things. I was a workaholic who constantly tried earning instead of just being my best and letting things go. I was a person who never felt like they were enough even though I was expending so much energy. God had a bigger plan for me and that plan was for me to know that I was good and wonderful because he made me. I believe now that the reason I didn’t feel good enough was because I was constantly trying to seek approval from relationships. I lived in fear of what others thought of me instead of being more concerned about what God felt about my life work.

By the beginning of the Summer I was in a place where I had no other options but to cry out and pray feverishly. Have you ever been in that position? Where you realized NOTHING else is working and you CANNOT go on like that any longer so you cry out to God? And then he spoke. He told me I will find a way. A few weeks later that path was opened. And within a few weeks my entire life shifted. My life exploded.

I’ve had many of you write to me about how my pictures and posts have changed - the reason is because I experienced an inner transformation that was so large it bled to every exterior part of me. I glow because I am joyful. I smile harder because I know what it is like to go through the most trying of times and come out of it. I feel confidence that I no longer have to seek approval for what someone else thinks about me because I work for God. I work for things that are unseen. And you know what? I’m not anything special. You can have blessing beyond your thinking capacity, too.

If you are dealing with terrible times right now, my heart goes out to you. I want you to know that there is so much more after you walk through those valleys - keep your eyes on your faith in knowing God will lead you through it. Diamonds can only be cut with diamonds and are formed under an immense amount of pressure. Your life can explode and will improve with faith. James (my favorite author in the bible besides Jesus) states that trials and tribulations produce perseverance. Perseverance produces character and leads to hope. Hope leads to a strengthened faith. You see it’s not in the easy times of life that we develop our character… it’s in the tough moments. How we act, what we choose to do with our time, where we spend or give money. It’s in those times God molds us so we can resurface anew.

I also want to conclude with a huge thank you to my sweet and beautiful friend Jaime Salinas. She’s an incredibly talented photographer who came up with this idea for me to jump in the Stella Hotel pool to get these shots! Love you Jaime!!! You can book here here.